


Texted to Distracted

by Cookies_and_Chaos



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-30
Updated: 2019-12-30
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:07:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 514
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22033027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cookies_and_Chaos/pseuds/Cookies_and_Chaos
Summary: Lucifer insisted on starting a countdown for Chloe’s birthday early, and Maze is no help at all.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 15





	Texted to Distracted

It all started with a text from Lucifer.

“I am begging you Maze”, Chloe said as she followed the demon through to the kitchen, "I need to know what he's planning".

“Well, you’re getting there but we’re not quite in begging territory yet”, Maze said as she poured herself some of Trixie’s cereal, “I am looking forward to when you really beg though, you know the, 'I’ll do anything' begging”.

“That’s not going to happen”, Chloe said and she took the box of cereal back off of Maze before she overflowed the bowl with cheery stars and circles that didn’t even look like cereal, “how are you going to get milk in there?”

“Why would I have milk?”, Maze asked and as she looked at Chloe as though she were daft, Chloe reminded herself she had more important matters at hand.

“These texts”, and she held out her phone for Maze to see the most recent one from Lucifer, “are making me so distracted all I can do is sit and plot out all the horrible ways my birthday could end in disaster”.

“Five days”, Maze read and she shrugged, “So, he’s excited for your birthday”.

“He’s been counting it down for nearly  _ a month _ ”, and Chloe scrolled back through the messages for Maze, “he even got a new number just to send these texts so that his other messages wouldn’t clog up the countdown”.

“So he’s really excited for your birthday”, Maze said, “what’s the big deal anyway? I thought you humans liked surprises”.

Chloe sighed and ran one hand through her hair as she paced the small space in front of the kitchen counter. Maze continued to munch through her mountain of cereal as she watched her.

“We’ve been over this, humans are not a homogenous collective that all feel and think the same”, Chloe said, “I don’t like surprises”.

“Perhaps you’re not human”, Maze suggested and Chloe groaned.

“Think of it this way, just like I’m sure all demons don’t like torture-”, Chloe started and Maze held up her hand to stop her.

“Now you’re just talking nonsense”

“Really? There’s no demons, none at all, who just don’t dig the whole torturing people business?”, Chloe asked. Maze pondered the question as she chewed on another handful of cereal. The bowl didn’t seem to be getting any emptier and Chloe wondered if the demon had managed to top it up without her looking.

“There _was_ this one demon who just wasn’t as enthusiastic about the torture as the rest of us. I always kinda thought he was just phoning it in…”, Maze said eventually.

“So imagine I am to humans what that demon is to, well, demons”, Chloe said, “except about surprises”.

“Hmmm”, Maze nodded, “I always did wonder where he went. I assumed someone killed him”.

“That’s not what I...”, Chloe sat down on the bar stool on the other side of the breakfast counter and dropped her head into her hands, “you know what, nevermind”.

Maze pushed the bowl of never-ending cereal forward until it was in Chloe’s eyeline,

“Cereal?”


End file.
